Some interesting ways to annoy Punekars

1. Tell them that shaniwarwada is a boring site and doesn’t deserve to be in list of heritage sites. Tell them no city that calls itself the 'cultural capital' of a state treats its monuments this bad.

2. Tell them traffic in Bangalore is worse than traffic in Pune, no need to be proud that 'once you drive in Pune, then you can drive anywhere in world'.

3. Tell them that Kalmadi belonged to Pune and Puneri people still support him because he organized Pune festival (which is an overrated thing anyway).

4. Tell them that Puneri Marathi is not the purest one, point out some 'non-pure' words from their speaking, such as 'mhanla' instead of 'mhanala'.

5. Tell them their so called amrut-tulya tea shops suck at making even a drinkable tea.

6. Tell them that Hyderabad and Bangalore are ahead in terms of quality of work and salary for IT organizations. Tell them that Microsoft and Google both are based in Hyderabad and Bangalore but not in Pune.

7. Tell them education in Pune is overrated and most of the colleges, barring few prestigious ones, are at best average.

8. Point out at the BRTS lane and start laughing hysterically.

9. Tell them that Pune Railway station is worst managed station you have seen.

10. Ask them how many terminuses does Pune station have, and then slowly start counting the terminuses in Hyderabad, Bangalore and Mumbai and watch expressions on their face.

11. Ask them the distance between Mumbai and Pune, and then start wondering aloud why there is difference of day and night in its work culture and attitude to outsiders despite being so close to Mumbai.

12. If you are talking to a young Punekar, then tell them you have seen more hot girls at Dadar station than entire Pune city.

13. Ask them why was there vehement opposition against helmet rule from Punekars when it was proposed by the state govt.

14. Tell them Hyderabad has local train network and Bangalore has metro. Say nothing about Pune, and watch their face :-).

15. Ask them if they know the concept of a ring road, and why Pune doesn’t have it yet.

16. Ask them what happened to the Air Conditioned buses that PMPML had started few years back.

17. Tell them that wada pao at any street vendors outside any local station in Mumbai is better than the one you get in Joshi wadewale.

18. If at first a Punekar doesn't get annoyed, then repeat the list from start to end a few times till he/she gets really annoyed.

19. Tell them that Mumbai has Bombay high court, Nagpur has a high court bench, and even Aurangabad has a high court bench, but Pune doesn't.

20. Start discussing the performance of Pune Warriors India team in the IPL.

21. Ask them when is the Pune Metro starting.

22. Ask them what does the name Rising Pune Supergiants (Pune team in IPL) exactly mean.

23. After that tell him/her you were just kidding and you love the place :-)

Quora Answer: Which countries watch Bollywood movies besides India?

There is one rather unexpected name in the countries whose people know about Bollywood and enjoy watching its movies, is Senegal, a small African country, located on its west coast and known for its French colonial heritage and natural attractions.

This is what Shashi Tharoor has to say about Bollywood movies and Hindi TV shows in one of his TED talks of November 2009, about Nations pursuing Soft Power :

"[...]having said that, the fact is that Bollywood is now taking a certain aspect of Indian-ness and Indian culture around the globe, not just in the Indian diaspora in the U.S. and the U.K., but to the screens of Arabs and Africans, of Senegalese and Syrians. I've met a young man in New York whose illiterate mother in a village in Senegal takes a bus once a month to the capital city of Dakar, just to watch a Bollywood movie. She can't understand the dialogue.She's illiterate, so she can't read the French subtitles. But these movies are made to be understood despite such handicaps, and she has a great time in the song and the dance and the action. She goes away with stars in her eyes about India, as a result."

Continuing further, he talks about how Hindi TV daily soaps have made a mark on minds of Afghanistan's local people.

"[...]You know what was India's biggest asset in Afghanistan in the last seven years? One simple fact: you couldn't try to call an Afghan at 8:30 in the evening. Why? Because that was the moment when the Indian television soap opera, "Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi," dubbed into Dari, was telecast on Tolo T.V. And it was the most popular television show in Afghan history. Every Afghan family wanted to watch it. They had to suspend functions at 8:30. Weddings were reported to be interrupted so guests could cluster around the T.V. set, and then turn their attention back to the bride and groom. Crime went up at 8:30. I have read a Reuters dispatch -- so this is not Indian propaganda, a British news agency -- about how robbers in the town of Musarri Sharif* stripped a vehicle of its windshield wipers, its hubcaps, its side-view mirrors, any moving part they could find, at 8:30, because the watchmen were busy watching the T.V. rather than minding the store. And they scrawled on the windshield in a reference to the show's heroine, "Tulsi Zindabad (Long live Tulsi)."

Source : Transcript of "Why nations should pursue soft power"

Quora link : https://www.quora.com/Which-countries-watch-bollywood-movies-besides-India/answer/Swapnil-Bhandarkar?srid=pcO5

Quora Answer : Where is the best graffiti and street art in India?

A few days ago I happened to go to Delhi, and got to know about the Lodhi Colony Street Art Project. These are some pictures I took there, showcasing the work of various international street artistes who painted these walls under the street art festival that took place from 15th Dec 2015 to 16th Feb 20216. For more information, here is the website -> ST+ART India

The art is really mesmerizing, and kudos to the residents of lodhi colony and the municipal authorities to encourage such type of street art, considering such art is not very common in India yet (except for Kochi may be, where also it started only recently).

Link to quora answer : https://www.quora.com/Where-is-the-best-graffiti-and-street-art-in-India/answer/Swapnil-Bhandarkar?srid=pcO5

What we think of our fellow Indians

The other day I was searching something on google and stumbled upon this treasure hunt of sorts on our collective impressions about people from other Indian states. I typed in some words and allowed google to auto complete. The results are here. Some are funny while others are ridiculous. But one thing is common though, people from each state think that people from other states are racist :).

Obviously I am taking all these auto completes with a truckload of salt, because surely we can't be so negative in our assumptions about others (or is it some western conspiracy to divide and rule us :P ).

Starting with Maharashtrians. I somehow think the first entry is suggested not because this is what other people thinking, but perhaps this is what Maharashtrians themselves are searching for. Other suggestion of whether we are Dravidians is perhaps a known curiosity. Some people can take the suggestion of us being ghatis a bit negatively though. Other adjectives assigned to us are useless, racist, cheap and rude, which I have absolutely no reason to doubt that they are stemmed from the stereotypical Bollywood portrayal of Maharashtrians. We may well be lazy too, as I don't see any reason to doubt this suggestion :).

Gujratis come next. So some people think even Gujratis are the best, while others think they are cheap and only think about money. Some people even think they are cowards, and it makes me wonder on what basis people make these assumptions. And based on my experiences with gujjus so far, I don't believe in the last suggestion of them being racist at all.

Coming to the South, people generally seem to agree that south India is more developed, but don't share positive views about south Indians in general. So Tamils are viewed as bastards, arrogant and what not. Telugu people are both stupid and smart. Keralites are considered cunning (a trait I don't identify with at all), selfish, and of course intelligent. Similarly, Kannadigas are viewed as lazy and idiots. I fail to understand how on earth can someone think that way?

Moving towards North, Biharis do have this bad reputation.

Talking about Delhiites, people think they are not just lazy, they are terribly lazy :). And of course their rudeness is a commonly known perception all over India anyway.

Kashmiris are somehow the only lot to be the exception to this negative stereotype. People generally seem to think overall positive things about them, if you ignore the first suggestion here.

There is more or less same perception of Marwaris and Sindhis - cheap and rich. But they do think Sindhis are good looking :).

I had thought Punjabis have the best perception among other people, owing to their easy going nature and jovial attitude. But no. People think they racist, cunning and non-Indian ! Of course some do think they are the best ;).

Towards the eastern side, Bengalis do invoke rather strong reaction too.

Oriyas are perceived as lazy, for god knows what reason :).

Even Goans are perceived as lazy and racist. What's even more ridiculous is that people seem to be questioning their nationality !

So crux of the matter remains that people generally think other states breed predominantly racist, cheap and lazy people. What a great united country we are ;).

Disclaimer : These auto complete suggestions keep changing over time. So what was suggested 6 months back may not be suggested today. Moreover I think the auto complete may also be dependent on where these searches are carried out from. So if I am searching from Maharashtra, then auto complete may be showing our perception of the other people. If I had searched from Delhi then it would have shown a delhiite's perception of other states. But I have no proof obviously, so just forget all the negative things shown about your state :).

Quora link : https://www.quora.com/India-What-do-Indians-think-about-Indians/answer/Swapnil-Bhandarkar?srid=pcO5

For those who think he is not the greatest - 2

He plays cricket to earn money, not to win matches. He doesnt play T20 then why IPL ?

Answer is simple. T20 is obviously younger people's game. It requires all hitting and no technique. Imagine how painful it would have been to see our senior players ( Sachin, Dravid, Ganguly etc) hitting the ball like Robin Uthappa (walking down the track) or Chris Gayle( hammering, literally) do. Their batting style, technique is what makes them world class batsmen. And ofcourse strike rate also does play an important role. None of them ( and none of us) want India to lose because they can not hit the ball with strike rate of 200. But its not the same with IPL. In IPL they are playing for their own clubs and its the presence of these players that brings the spectators to the ground. The players have nothing to lose, having proved themselves already in the other versions of the game. And of course huge money is involved. So why should anyone say no to IPL ? That Sachin and his team are unable to perform well in IPL is different matter. And who knows, just like the underdogs RR and DC won the previous IPLs, MI might win it next time !

Ponting/Flintoff/Peterson/Dhoni/Lara/Gibbs/Jaysuriya and the lot are better cricketers than him :

Frankly, whenever any cricketer is creating waves across international media for his unique style, better strike rate, better average or whatever, Sachin is often compared with him and we start finding the non-existent flaws of Sachin. Eventually the so called 'better' batsman fades out and goes out of the limelight. Sachin has remained where he was.

Consider Michael Bevan. Steve Waugh called him better than Sachin because of his ability to rotate the strike and to remain notout. He did that for quite some time. Where is he now ?

Consider Jaysuriya. He is no doubt one of the greatest ODI batsmen, but has he been even 10% consistent as Sachin ? I dont think so.

Consider Flintoff/Peterson. Even this is funny. These 2 players are out of the team for more time than they are in playing for the team. Morever, how many matches have actually been won by them ? Except for the Ashes triumph, Peterson hasn't been involved in many great victories for England. His performance in ODIs is also not consistent. Flintoff, all he could manage was 3 ODI centuries and 2 five wicket hauls( 5 centuries in tests and 3 five wicket hauls). Peterson, a great hitter of the ball, his T20 record has been disastrous(average 15).

The only player who comes close to him in runs, consistency, centuries or match winning performance is Ponting. But he still has a lot of catching up to do, especially in ODIs. In tests he still has a chance to surpass Sachin. Lets see how far he succeeds. Only if he does that, he can claim to be the greatest, not before that.
Dhoni can definitely go down in history as India's best captain; but even he can't be compared with Sachin in terms of his style, technique, temperament ( and all such crap you can think of :-). And please dont say that you like his helicopter shot ! ). He is obviously unable to score more runs as he comes too late down the order. And he has taken a rather softened stand now as compared to his earlier days of hardhitting. His T20 record is also not very good (strike rate of 102). There have been a few instances where despite his being on the crease, India lost the match because he couldn't shift gear to come back into attacking mode. And most importantly, its still too early to compare a 5 year old with 20 year old in cricketing terms, isnt it ? Agreed, he won us the T20 world cup with a bunch of 20-somethings, but a crucial factor for that win was that since nobody expected anything from the team, they were relatively pressure free unlike the 2009 T20 world cup, where they faltered in the first round itself, because of the immense pressure. So if someone says the earlier T20 win was a fluke, then what's wrong with that ?

All said and done, people who want to, will keep finding flaws in him. And he, as always, without being affected by them, will continue to play like a god. Like David Shephard said, if he is not the best player in the world, show me the best player in the world.

For those who think he is not the greatest - 1

Ok, here's 4,961,280th article about him. Surely in cricket crazy country like us, the only authority everyone possesses and exercises to the fullest is the advice to our cricketers. Remember the Reliance mobile ad about advices "Ohh, Square cut maarna chahiye tha yaar !!!" ? I am no different than them, so being a responsible citizen (!) and a keen cricket follower( in fact cricket being theonly sport I can understand), I am jumping into the bandwagon of he-is versus he-is-not debate.Rather than going into how his stats prove he-is-the-best, it will be better to analyse the often said negative things against him and then proving them wrong, point by point( of course we'll need stats then). Often people criticize him on the basis of one or more of following points.
1. He is not a match winner.
2. He has won very few tournaments for India/He doesn't click in the final/crucial matches.
3. He is not a team player/He is a selfish cricketer/He is not a good leader.
4. He plays cricket to earn money, not to win matches. Thats why he doesnt play T20 but plays IPL..
5. Ponting/Flintoff/Peterson/Dhoni/Lara/Gibbs/Jaysuriya and the lot are better cricketers than him (and they try to prove this using the statistics, conveniently ignoring Sachin's stats).

He is not a match winner/He hasn't won India many tournaments/He doesnt click in the crucial matches:

45 ODI centuries, 33 resulting in winning cause. Yes he is not a match winner. After scoring 175 runs and single handedly bringing India to a thrilling win, he systematically and un-match-winneristically threw away his wicket. Had the other batsmean showed the courage of staying on for some more time on the crease, it could have been a different picture. Forget about the tailenders, if our top batting order had added even 1 run each to their paltry scores, we could have won the match. Criticizing him for not being able to finish that match is akin to that joke where a dog goes to a supermarket, buys groceries, pays the bill and comes back home only to be beaten by his owner for forgetting to take the door keys third time in the week. No matter how high he scores, critics will always find out some flaw or the other. He also supposedly failed to perform in the world up final 2003, and that we lost the cup because of that. Again the same dog joke applies. The only person because of whom we reached the finals was him, and his failure in the final match cost us the world cup ? How absurd is that ? Why couldn't a single batsman show the ability to stick to the wicket and give at least a fight (which Sehwag did by the way, but it was too late then) ? Same is true for the semifinal of 1996 World cup too. Harakiri is the only word that can best be used to describe what happened after he got out.
Cricket, at the very least, is definitely the game of 2 people, the batsman and the non striker. When people give references of how Ponting or Gilchrist or jaysuriya, single handedly won matches for their countries, they often forget the support provided to them by their partner at non-striker's end. Only in Sachin's case the person at non-striker's end is literally non striking. Remember the gem of an inning played by Ponting in World Cup 2003 final ( 140*). Throughout the knock he was supported by Damien Martin (88*) who came to the crease almost at the same time as Ponting, but chose to let Ponting do all the attacking. Or take the case of historic match between Aus and SA of the highest run chase. Ponting did score a classic 164, but not without the support of Katich(79) and Hussey(81 in 51) to get Aus to 434/4. In same match, when Gibbs outscored Ponting by scoring 175(111 balls), Graeme Smith scored 90 in 55 to give their team a headstart. Even Boucher scored a fifty to take the game away from Aus. Has that ever happened to Sachin ? definitely not when we are chasing big totals. Not when he scores 175, not when he scores 143 in Sharjah( we lost the match after he was given LBW wrongly), not when he scores 141 vs Pak (http://www.cricinfo.com/ci/engine/match/64882.html), and definitely not when he scores 136 in Chennai. Still we blame you-know-who.
Talk about Jaysuriya winning more matches for SL. True, he took SL till the semifinals of the world cup. But he failed in both the semis and finals. Despite this, SL won because Aravind Desilva played well in both the matches. In our case, when Sachin fails, we commit harakiri. The rare occasions when Sachin failed and still we won are far and few( Natwest series final and Dhoni's 183 knock against SL being few of them).
This was about his supposed failures. In the last few tournaments which India has managed to win, Sachin has played well in almost all of them. In the Triseries final in Aus, he scored 117 and 91 in the finals. In Compaq cup final, he scored a century to beat SL. Or the 166 in 131 balls against NZ. If these are not match winning knocks, then what are ?

He is not good team leader/ He is not a good team player/ He is a selfish cricketer:

Ok, his captaicy stint has been disastrous, and continues in IPL too. But how does captaincy record can hamper one's reputation as a great batsman? Lara, Jaysuriya, Flintoff and Peterson ( people with whom he is often compared with) have all been bad captains. In fact this is the only point where Ponting scores ahead of Sachin. But the point is, Sachin knew his limitations. He knew captaincy was not his cup of tea and resigned himself without being forced. He knew it was affecting both the team and his own batting too. He wanted to do what he can do best - Batting. What was so selfish in that ?
Yes he is not a good team player. Thats why he came back within 4 days after his father expired to play for 'himself' in the 1999 world cup. So what the century was against a minnows team, isn't the fact important that he could have easily excused himself from the rest of tournament without being questioned about it ever ?
People call him selfish because he didnt pay tax on the Ferrari. Now this one is really funny. Calling him a selfish cricketer just beause he allegedly applied for tax waiver for the Ferrari or that he wanted some plot in Bandra for concessional rates is like calling Amitabh is pathetic actor because he is involved in land fraud !! Why and how what happens outside the cricket field affects his genius inside the field ?
Ok, even if he becomes a not-so-great or li'l-selfish cricketer, then by applying the same standards, what do we make of Ponting ? Remember how he and his men pushed BCCI chief Sharad Pawar after winning the Champions Trophy ? Ponting has often been called as an arrogant cricketer. And Aussies are without doubt sledging kings, with their captain leading the way. Some of the other so called greats like Jaysuriya, Peterson or Flintoff have often been embroiled with controversies because of their behaviour within and outside the field. Compared to them Sachin is a saint, letting only his bat do all the talking. In fact after his comments about mumbai, he should be given some prize about national integration.

To be continued...

Some quotes from Catch-22

Some of the funniest and paradoxical quotes I have ever heard are from Catch-22(Not that I have read many books, frankly). A few of these keep repeating throughout the book making it funny without being monotonous. Though the book gets repetitive and monotonous sometimes, but that's something different.

Just listing down some of the quotes from the book. A complete list can be found on these links.

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Catch-22

http://www.generationterrorists.com/quotes/catch-22.shtml

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catch-22

http://www.workinghumor.com/quotes/catch22.shtml

• Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. With Major Major it had been all three.
• There's no patriotism, that's what it is. And no matriotism, either.
• But I make a profit of three and a quarter cents an egg by selling them for four and a quarter cents an egg to the people in Malta I buy them from for seven cents an egg. Of course, I don't make the profit. The syndicate makes the profit. And everybody has a share.
• Dear Mrs., Mr., Miss, or Mr. And Mrs. Daneeka: Words cannot express the deep personal grief I experienced when your husband, son, father, or brother was killed, wounded, or reported missing in action.
• Yossarian, they can prepare as many official reports as they want and choose whichever ones they need on any given occasion. Didn't you know that?
• Doc Daneeka was Yossarian's friend and would do just about nothing in his power to help him.
• The case against Clevinger was open and shut. The only thing missing was something to charge him with.
• "They're trying to kill me," Yossarian told him calmly.
   "No one's trying to kill you," Clevinger cried.
   "Then why are they shooting at me?" Yossarian asked.
   "They're shooting at everyone," Clevinger answered.  "They're trying to kill everyone."
   "And what difference does that make?"
• The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.
• The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likable. In three days no one could stand him.
• He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
• How can he see he's got flies in his eyes if he's got flies in his eyes ?
• Yossarian owed his good health to exercise, fresh air, teamwork and good sportsmanship; it was to get away from them all that he had first discovered the hospital.
• Anything worth dying for, is certainly worth living for.
• Of course they had a right (to lie to you). Don't be such an ass, Scheisskopf. People have a right to do anything that's not forbidden by law, and there's no law against lying to you.
• It's better to live on one's feet than to die on one's knees.